Are You My Mama?
Have you ever heard a manager say, “I feel like I’m running a day care center?” There is a good reason when the manager says this. The employees are acting like children! How does this happen? I believe the primary reason is that we, managers, have a tendency to act as if we are the employees’ parent rather than their coach. Take a look at the model below.
My contention is that, while most of us have not had great role models of good performance coaching nor have many of us received extensive performance management training. Most of us, however, have been a parent or been parented. Some of us have risen into the management ranks due to our excellent operational performance and extra-mile attitude and behavior. We know how to work hard and we know how to fix things. However, when it comes to people, we have a tendency to revert to a model that we have seen before, parenting.
The model above attempts to show that when employees behave in child-like manners
- How many do I have to do?
- What if I don’t meet my goal?
- I’m not the only one not doing it correctly.
- How late is late?
We have a tendency to respond is a parenting manner, which causes the employee to respond in deeper and more significant childlike manners.
If you want your employees to respond effectively, as adults, do the following:
- Give the employee the tools to do their job.
- Knowledge
- Time
- Technology
- Compliment them when the do it correctly.
- Redirect them when they do it ineffectively.
If you have done all the above and the employee does not respond with improved performance be prepared to move forward in the termination process.
As you see in the model above, the alternative to the parent/child relationship is the adult/adult relationship. The thinking process of the manager using the adult model is, “I’ll ensure you have the tools to do your job. It is up to you to use the tools to be successful. If you do then I will recognize and reward you. If not, I’ll redirect you to ensure you understand what is expected. If you still do not perform to expectations, I’ll hold you accountable to the point of termination.”
I discuss this subject in great detail in my book, “Coaching for Maximum Performance.”
If your organization is serious about sales and service excellence, contact Michael Neill and Associates at 888-440-0552, or mike@banksaleschamps.com, to find out how you can join other organizations that have done so.